Friday, March 15th, 2019

Wisdom’s instruction is to fear the Lord, and humility comes before honor.

Proverbs 15:33

This is an interesting text for the day but more on that later.  For the purposes of keeping everyone up to speed of our goings on, I (Jeff) pulled baby duty today at the hospital.  It was a somewhat bittersweet day as I knew that one of the little boys we looked after was going to be discharged on Monday to go to a new home.  This was a huge win for him as it would mean a potentially loving family dedicated to his care and well being.  For me, it was a bit saddening.  In only four days I had grown to love this little man.  He was full of life and energy and always had a smile.  I looked forward to seeing him every day and I even admitted to Sara this evening that had someone told me he was available for adoption I would not have hesitated a moment to bring him into our family.  It was love at first sight and now he is going home with someone else, and I am overjoyed for him, and I will miss him.

I suspect that the next few weeks will be much like today, full of the joy of loving these little ones who are so needy but so loving in return and then being sad to see them go but equally happy to know that they are going somewhere that will offer better care and more constant attention.  I know that I do not have the resources to care for all of these children but if there were a way to do it I would take them all.  So instead, just like Sara and FFR, I do the absolute best I can for the time that I have here.  It is excruciatingly hard to leave them each day after only thirty minutes, or maybe longer if I am lucky, but I know that I have given them every ounce of love that I have.  I can only hope that will be enough until they get the full ration they deserve.

Now back to the reading.  Sara recently submitted her resume for a position which would be a tremendous opportunity for her.  She is equal measures of excited, nervous, and worried that she might get and might not get the job.  She wants this job but is worried she may not get it since she has been out of the workforce so long.  I asked her about her feelings and she said that she has been praying a lot about this, but not the type of prayer many of us would say.  She did not ask God to give her the job.  Instead she has prayed to God humbling herself to His will, recognizing that His plan is best and affirming that she will abide by His plan whatever that may be.  While she is hopeful that this job is part of His plan, she also believes that if it isn’t then at least she has been given a sense of direction for her career. Her prayers, in my opinion, reflect this reading beautifully.  She reveres the Lord and recognizes His sovereignty over our lives and she humbles herself before His will.  After committing 20 years to my career and asking Sara to stay home with the kids as they grew older I admit that I hope it is her time now to realize what she wants in her career.  I hope that her humility and reverence will result in her achieving the honor of this job which she desires.  I know though that if she is not hired it is only because there is something better for her around the corner.

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